the author of the next chapter

The other night I had a dream that the Prophet spoke to me. He was speaking to everyone, over the pulpit, and I was watching him on my laptop screen like I always do during General Conference, but all of a sudden, in my dream, I knew he was speaking to me and me alone.

He told me to pack up my things and move myself & my family to Salem, Massachusetts. So we did. We found a house on Zillow, with 5 bedrooms, near the coast. In my dream, it felt so significant - Salem is the town well known for the Puritan witch hunts and burnings. I was consumed with thoughts about modern Christianity’s fallen forms, and how in its very first chapters on this continent it had gone despairingly wrong. In my dream, we would park ourselves on that spot because the Prophet of God told us to, and in the dream it felt like it was representational of ownership of past mistakes. It was a form of identifying ourselves AS Christians, despite the portions of Christian history we would prefer to forget.

In my dream, my lot in life was to wait, in that house, on the coast, looking Eastward for the Son of God to return.

When I woke up, I knew I wasn’t actually supposed to move to Salem, MA. I still downloaded Zillow and looked at a few houses for fun, seeing if I could find the one from my dream. For almost a million dollars, I found something halfway similar.

The real significance of this dream for me was that I don’t think I’ve had a Second Coming dream since I was in high school. I used to have them quite frequently. The scenarios varied greatly, but I was always full of both fear and faith simultaneously. I still remember details of some of them - me ushering innocent people into a safe room. me watching with dread as evil men plundered the building with weapons, me reassuring children and adults alike who were drowning spiritually, letting them lean on my faith for a moment. Sometimes there were aliens, sometimes storms, sometimes everyone was simply running around confused. But my dream always ended the same way: the sun breaking over the hills at dawn, my heart rising into my throat, a realization that the Savior had returned, and then I’d wake up.

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These past couple of years have forced me to ask myself a lot of hard questions. Some - most - don’t have answers.

I’ve seen the fulfillment of the prophecy that “peace will be taken from the earth” in the last days.

I’m learning to shrug off the responsibility of thinking, always, about everyone, and what everything means, for everyone, every minute of every day. I cannot control other people. I am not personally responsible for the stupidity of others. People are wild and independent; our God-given agency encompasses the agency to be willfully ignorant. God is allowing everyone to choose so that we can all stand accountable for our choices.

This is hard for me to accept in the face of our healthcare system being pushed toward collapse by people’s choices, but I am capable of feeling peace.

I’m starting by refusing to tune in to the rhetoric of social media. With my extra time this week, I noticed something I had missed before: the webs spun by local spiders during the night, catching the light of the morning sun.

Peep the many smaller spiderwebs in the grass! Those spiders are hard at work during the night!

Peep the many smaller spiderwebs in the grass! Those spiders are hard at work during the night!

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We have a new friend in our house: a lizard who found his way indoors somehow, and consistently evades capture. We’ve stopped trying to catch him and have simply accepted him as a pet. His name is Frank.

Here, Gwen is offering him markers so he can color and feel welcome in our home.

Spoiler alert: the lizard does not feel like coloring.

On Tuesday, I attended my first playgroup activity with some local Latter-day Saint moms. We all went to a trampoline park in Bossier that was having a Toddler Time discount.

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I met three moms who seem very outgoing and fun. I’m stoked about hanging out with them more. The one who arranged this activity invited me to a couple other gigs she was putting together, including a karaoke night at her house.

There was another mother there who wasn’t local - she was from New Orleans! She had fled north before Hurricane Ida and was staying with her parents in Shreveport. She had three children very close in age, and reported that her house now has a hole in the roof, but is otherwise intact and un-flooded. The rest of her neighborhood was safe from damages as well. I warned her about the phony, unqualified roofing companies that typically spring up in the wake of a hurricane, do sub-par work, get paid, and then disappear to avoid accountability. She told me she’d heard of that happening as well and had already called a company they had worked with before, who had been in business for 5+ years. Thank goodness!

Gwen happily fiddled with arcade games while I chatted with the family from New Orleans.

Gwen happily fiddled with arcade games while I chatted with the family from New Orleans.

The rest of the day was a whirlwind, as Tuesdays always are.

Gwen was so sad over the prospect of going back to daycare that I decided to bring her with me to teach my classes, just to see how it would go. I brought the tablet along and she happily played in the corner while I taught my homeschool kids.

After we went to pick up Abby, we stopped at Dollar General for some snacks. When we returned to the church, we found out that we needed to move rooms! Because of Labor Day weekend, the Monday kids in the ACT prep class missed their chance to take a practice test. They needed a room where they could adequately spread out and have quiet, so they needed my room! The only other space for me to go was in the foyer. So I squashed my girls into a chair with tablets and snacks, set up my art supplies on a card table, and attempted to teach my 3:30 student, who was painting, while all the after school kids filtered in and stood around us while they ate their snacks. Abby, who was very excitable, wanted to know what time it was every 2-3 minutes because she usually goes to the elementary tutoring room during the second hour. Janice had to come shoo the extra kids away a few times to give us some space.

The final art class was a bit easier, but still very cramped. It’s a very old church and I had an art projector that I had hoped to use with the kids, but the one outlet in the foyer didn’t work. By the time classes were over, I was asking Weston to hurry and come pick the girls up so I could clean up the supplies without also having to chase Gwen around (she was now bored with the tablet and very curious about what the other students were doing in other rooms).

All in all, I determined that even though it was an extra crazy week with losing my classroom, in future weeks Gwen WILL be attending daycare. Whew!

Abby working on a very detailed drawing during my 3:30 class

Abby working on a very detailed drawing during my 3:30 class

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After that incredibly long day, Weston got the fire pit operational and cooked us some hot dogs. I was almost too tired to pick mine up and eat it.

I’m falling further and further behind as the days march on and this blog post is still unfinished, so I’m going to quickly dump some photos and say what I feel like saying about each of them.

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Redoing Abby’s room with pink paint (Flamingo Feather by Behr) and gold vinyl polka dots!

Redoing Abby’s room with pink paint (Flamingo Feather by Behr) and gold vinyl polka dots!

Our neighborhood has long, quiet roads and many many trees. One very wealthy man - a former Louisiana governor, I heard - owns a huge chunk of this land and will not sell it or develop it because it surrounds his big mansion with many acres of wilderness. I hope that’s true. I love these woods. There’s lots of variety in this neighborhood. Our house, an empty lot, a double wide with lots of porch decorations, a massive mansion with a pool, more empty lots, a single family home, woods. All good people.

Our neighborhood has long, quiet roads and many many trees. One very wealthy man - a former Louisiana governor, I heard - owns a huge chunk of this land and will not sell it or develop it because it surrounds his big mansion with many acres of wilderness. I hope that’s true. I love these woods.

There’s lots of variety in this neighborhood. Our house, an empty lot, a double wide with lots of porch decorations, a massive mansion with a pool, more empty lots, a single family home, woods. All good people.

Reverently, quietly, lovingly we think of Thee.

Reverently, quietly, softly sing the melody.

Reverently, quietly, humbly now we pray - let Thy Holy Spirit dwell in our hearts today.

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A painting in progress. For our living room.

A painting in progress. For our living room.

Teaching art has been going better and better with every passing week. I’m getting the hang of connecting with my students.

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One thing it’s causing me to do is to humbly reflect on all the years it’s taken me to become the artist that I am. I was once where my students are. Years and years of practice and study have resulted in me being able to paint the way I do. I am so grateful for the time and effort Past Me has put in, and now Present Me is going to keep painting and studying so Future Me can paint even better.

A wool blanket and having to watch Mom type on the computer will do this to a person.

A wool blanket and having to watch Mom type on the computer will do this to a person.

We had the pleasure of meeting Johnny Appleseed at the library! He was in the area planting trees. I don’t want to spoil this for anybody, but he’s married to our local librarian!

We had the pleasure of meeting Johnny Appleseed at the library! He was in the area planting trees. I don’t want to spoil this for anybody, but he’s married to our local librarian!

SPIDER GWEN!!!

SPIDER GWEN!!!

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Lately I’m living by something I saw on a sign at Hobby Lobby -

“I do not fear the next chapter because I know the Author.”

And the song that Johnny Appleseed sings in the Disney cartoon, “The Lord is good to me, and so I thank the Lord!”

Homeschool 2020 - What's Working for Us

This post contains products and links to those products. I am not affiliated with any program that reimburses me for influencing, posting, reviewing, or sharing their products. I am simply a homeschool mom who has finds these things extremely groovy. I am sharing them because I’m currently waiting on the 2020 election results and I need to keep my hands busy so I don’t eat too much Halloween candy.

HELLO to all my homeschool parents, COVID-school parents, public school parents, and everyone in between.

I’ve been getting a handful of people asking me for advice on curriculum lately, so I’m here to type up a grand list of WHAT WE BE UP TO. A collection of the things that have MADE THE CUT in our home this year.

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First, let me lead off with a description of my children and their learning styles. The best part of homeschool is deciding what works for YOUR family. So if your kids sound anything like mine, I am here for you. If your home dynamic is drastically different, you should definitely utilize personal revelation to help you figure out if anything listed below is worth your checking into.

ABIGAIL: As many of you know, Abby is now 5-and-a-half and reading up a storm. She is greatly driven by charts and rewards, and very visually influenced. If I write something on the chalkboard, she has dialed in before I even try to draw attention to it. She once memorized an entire scripture that I had written up there just for my own sake and repeated it back after it was erased.

Abby also has a love/hate relationship with written curriculum. We have used The Good and the Beautiful for math in the past, and though she always begs me to pull it out so we can work on it together, she is frustrated and bored after 10 minutes. She thrives best when SHE decides what to do, when to do it, and what order to do it in. She does not appreciate having to follow things in a prescribed order.

This is a blessing for me, because I am the same way. This is why UNSCHOOLING has appealed to me so much from the very beginning. Boooo, structure! Begone, scripts!

Abby is highly social. She has been known to sit in on adult conversations and politely chime in with precious tidbits of her own advice, without guile. She remembers names, she remembers if you mentioned you’re going on vacation (and she will ask you about it the next time she sees you) and basically, Abby’s learning style is REAL LIFE IMMERSION.

Recent wins with Abby: READING, of course. Her reading really took off like a shot at the beginning of September. She reads rapidly, with great inflection, and conquers longer words with ease. Her emotions are under better control now that she is older. And I feel comfortable letting her be more independent; making her own sandwiches, etc.

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GWEN: Gwen just turned three. SHE HAS NO CHILL. She is impulsive and energetic. If there is ANYTHING in front of her that she could touch, eat, drink, color on - she has to. She can’t hold herself back. In stark contrast, I frequently find her in her own little world with a pen and paper, carefully drawing tiny shapes, and she cannot hear her name being called. So, basically a mini-me.

She’s snuggly, as she always has been, and a VERY hands-on learner. She’s also extraordinarily brave - shoving unfamiliar food into her mouth, riding on a pony, jumping into water. Her attention span is freakishly long when it comes to puzzles - 20 minutes or more!

Recent wins with Gwen: I CAN LEAVE HER ALONE WITH BOOKS NOW. It’s been months since the last tearing-up incident, and more and more books are lingering in bed with her with no damage done. She has gained the attention span to allow me to read longer books to her. Her comprehension is increasing daily. She’s still frantic and random in most of what we do together, but every day she is learning a little better to sit down and listen to instructions.

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So let’s dive into what we’re doing in our homeschool!

THE MORNING 5: My girls are banging on all cylinders the second they come out of their rooms. They are rushing to jump into anything that pops into their heads - Dress Up, going to the park, writing a letter, getting out a game… all before they’ve even gotten dressed or eaten breakfast. I’m constantly fighting to solidify their morning habits so we can then MOVE ON with our day.

So I created the Morning 5 - Make Your Bed, Say Your Prayers, Get Dressed, Use the Potty, Eat Breakfast. Abby functions better when she can see things in a list. We put all our efforts into accomplishing those five things FIRST. Then we’re not scrambling between wanting to start an activity and a certain 3 year old still being in her nighttime diaper. Our rule is - NOTHING ELSE until we’ve done our MORNING 5!

OUR CHALKBOARD: I did an Instagram Story highlight about how I made this giant chalkboard for less than $30. If you follow me on Insta, go take a look! But I’ll tell you here too: a giant piece of Masonite board from Lowe’s (about 8ft in length) is $8.99. A bucket of chalkboard paint is $10. I used painter’s tape around the edges to give the appearance of a “frame” that was still wooden in color. We have yet to hang this puppy up on the wall, but it is alive and well and serving us even while sitting on the floor.

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The chalkboard is a central part of our homeschool when it comes to scriptures, quotes from General Conference, poems, and songs that I want to write on my girls’ hearts. It also helps centralize our schedule for the day. I write the date, the Morning 5, our scripture study, and then any activities, errands, or projects we need to tackle that day.

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THE BOOK OF MORMON FOR YOUNG READERS: My mom bought this study aid for us a few years ago and it has been a GAME CHANGER this year. I know 2020 is almost over and next year we’ll be studying the Doctrine and Covenants, but I plan to keep using this as we read the Book of Mormon continually as a family.

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It’s a happy medium between the Illustrated Stories from the Book of Mormon (which simplifies the scriptures down to a summary; one or two lines per illustration) and the Book of Mormon itself. The scriptures are still written verbatim (I’ll get to why I think that’s important in a minute) but charts, pictures, journal prompts, timelines, quotes from prophets, and other helpful graphics adorn each page. It takes much of the pressure to be a “natural scriptorian” off my shoulders, and provides me and my girls with tools to help us easily understand the scriptures.

I think it’s very important for young children to hear the scriptures read in their purest form, even if they understand very little. The scriptures contain complex language not found in today’s writing. Being exposed to this from an early age gives their minds a jump start on processing larger, older, more mature words. I think kids need a mix of hearing the scriptures read to them while they are eating (a full mouth is a quiet mouth!) as well as having doctrine explained to them in a simple and loving way, according to their questions.

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DAILY THEMES ON ROTATION: I’m a very spontaneous person, so I prefer to create “guidelines” for myself rather than plan everything to the letter. I created a theme for every day of the week. This ensures that I’m giving all the important subjects in my children’s lives equal focus, while giving me the freedom to make up what we’re going to do each day. They are as follows:

Sweet Spirit Sunday, Musical Monday, Tell Me A Story Tuesday, Write It Out Wednesday, Thinking Thursday, Friendly Friday, & Sparkly Saturday.

Sweet Spirit Sunday is a day for us to rest and be together, to go to church, and listen to soft music.

Musical Monday usually involves learning a new song, playing freely on instruments, having a dance party, or getting technical with music notation.

Tell Me A Story Tuesday is the day we visit the library. We load up on books, sink into the couch together, and read until Mom gets a sore throat. Then Abby usually keeps story time going.

Write It Out Wednesday is about the different parts of the writing process. We color to work on motor skills, we practice some letters, we write messages to each other in creative ways. We retell, summarize, and spin stories that we’ve already heard. We illustrate. We Marco Polo and text our friends.

Thinking Thursday is when we dive into STEM. We ask questions and get those questions answered. We do math worksheets, and we watch “How It’s Made” videos. My objective on this day is to follow their curiosities and open up new doors for them.

Friendly Friday is a day for friends! Even in the middle of a pandemic, no child can survive without other children. We tend to hang out with the same families, and we are always completely forthcoming about any exposures or symptoms before we get together.

Sparkly Saturday is all about making our home S P A R K L Y. Folding laundry, cleaning, vacuuming, doing outside chores that need doing. Then we spend the rest of the day having fun!

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BRAIN QUEST: This clever, stimulating workbook is available at Costco (and Amazon) for all elementary grade levels. Abby, as mentioned before, is very chart- and goal-oriented, but also loves to be able to set her own schedule and skip around as she pleases. She is currently working on the 1st Grade workbook because I flipped through a few at Costco and that seemed like the one that would maintain that challenging threshold she so desires in her learning. Gwen has been having fun with the old Pre-K one we have, but I don’t think she’s ready to dive into it quite yet.

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KIWICO SUBSCRIPTION BOXES: I bought 6 months of this back when we got our stimulus checks, and then forgot to cancel so I got 6 more months. I don’t mind one bit. We love when these little green boxes arrive. Each one contains all the materials necessary to build something step by step. We’ve gotten a doctor kit, a mechanical arm, a mechanical sweeper that eats pom poms, a kaleidescope kit, and many more projects and activities besides, in the past 6 months. Gwen has a hard time keeping her hands to herself during these activities but they are always educational, always easy, and always stimulating and fun. Plus they come with many more educational materials relating to the concept being taught by each project, like stories and extra activity ideas.

MUSIC NOTATION: Music is such a powerful way to teach so many subjects at once - language, social skills, gospel studies, mathematics, artistry, movement, history, and most importantly, joy. And music was put on the earth as a teaching tool to help mankind because it enters so easily into the heart.

I found a folder of old pieces of sheet music that my piano teacher used (circa 2003) to teach me to read music. I erased the note names I had written in and whited out what I couldn’t erase. Now I can make copies of these pieces and focus on helping my children recognize the different components of a musical piece (which, in this photo, I am in the middle of listing on a post-it). Staff, clefs, key, time signature, note value, rests, dynamics, accents and other markings. This is another moment where the chalkboard comes in handy. And thanks to our copier I can copy these as many times as I want to!

We also have a glockenspiel that allows us to play simple songs right at our kitchen table. On our real piano, I put special piano key stickers that show the note name and where it appears on the staff. I think this has been just as helpful for me as it has been for Abby and Gwen, if not more so! Haha! (I took 3 years of piano lessons from 2002-2005 and can fumble my way through a hymn. I’m much better at sight singing than sight playing, thanks to high school choir.)

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WELL-EDUCATED HEART: This resource - this movement - deserves its own separate blog post, but I’m going to try to condense it into this one, and keep my enthusiasm for it reined in enough to be understood. The Well-Educated Heart was created by Marlene Peterson, who many many years ago felt prompted to begin collecting, compiling, and organizing a library of literature, inspiring artwork, poetry, music, and the other creations of human history. She felt in her heart that MOTHERS would be the ones to lead out and change the world; that we would be a key factor in rescuing the goodness of humanity.

Because of the internet, we each have access to the greatest books and creations of human history. What a privilege for our children!!!! This website is at the base of everything I do in our school. It’s an organized library of good, uplifting material, most of which is free or public domain. There’s a library of beautiful fine art and a rotation of historical literature and other topics that’s further broken down into Elementary, Middle, and High School levels, with a collection of enrichment materials and activities to go with the topic. Recipes, music, movies from Sweden. Paintings of the American Revolution. Poetry from the Civil War.

The most important component of the Well-Educated Heart is the Mother’s University. Teach a mother, open up her heart, inspire her, help her, and you will have lifted an entire generation. A gigantic portion of the content on this website is FOR MOTHERS. It helped me tap into my influence and power, and ignited my own studies, which inspires my children.

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Please, the next time you’re in the kitchen or folding laundry, pop on the Catch The Vision introduction on your phone (this site has an app too!) and give it a listen. You’ll understand right away that this is no ordinary homeschool group.

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So those are the biggest components of what we do! We have a fun game here and there, a useful teaching tool, a book we love to read together. But unschooling isn’t about following a curriculum, or a prescribed order or grade level. It’s about real life experience and immersion in curiosity. It’s about doing the things we like to do, learning about the things that we’re curious about, and making decisions on our own.

The way kids learn to make good decisions is by making decisions, not by following directions.
— Alfie Kohn, Unconditional Parenting
From left to right: Come Follow Me for Primary: 2020 - Book of Mormon. A Girl’s Guide to Heavenly Mother by McArthur Krishna & Bethany Brady Spalding, The Book of Mormon Journal Edition, Book of Mormon Stories, The Book of Mormon for Young Reade…

From left to right: Come Follow Me for Primary: 2020 - Book of Mormon. A Girl’s Guide to Heavenly Mother by McArthur Krishna & Bethany Brady Spalding, The Book of Mormon Journal Edition, Book of Mormon Stories, The Book of Mormon for Young Readers By Kelli Coughanour, The Book of Mormon, The Gift of Self by Marion G. Hanks, The U.S. Constitution and Other Writings by Canterbury Classics, The History of the World in Bite-Sized Chunks by Emma Marriott, Minna’s Patchwork Coat by Lauren A. Mills, Anxious for Nothing by Max Lucado, and my composition notebook journal.

If you want to learn more about the unschooling style of learning, I suggest this blog post for a crash course, as well as this one. It really delights me, and even though we’re only a year into it, I can tell that I chose the right course for me and our family. If you want to ask me anything, drop a comment below! I’ll probably do another whole homeschooling post in a month or two and talk more about my philosophy and desires.

I am by no means a perfect parent, or even an exceptional one. I am simply a strong-willed mother who throws off outside pressures and expectations with wild abandon. I enjoy being the “overlord” of my children’s education AND allowing them to fill their own plates at the Curiosity Buffet. Gently pushing them to do hard things AND seeing their enjoyment when we focus on what’s fun. I make the rules. But so do they. We have defined our homeschool for ourselves and get so much satisfaction from that.

I hope this post has been helpful. I am always open to questions and discussion!

Love you all!!

xo Amber



Putting Down New Roots

I won’t dig too deep into Jacob chapter 5 in this blog post, but I will pose a few rhetorical questions.

Who do you love?

How would you feel if you suddenly lost someone you loved? What would your grief include?

Rewinding a bit, what would you do in an attempt to save this person? What would you be willing to give up?

Finally, and most importantly, what emotions did these questions bring to the surface?

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Into the Sap

I’ve mentioned this before, but the strangest shift has occurred in my studio over the past couple months. When I packed away my oil paints to move to Texas 2.5 years ago, I thought for sure I’d never open that box again. Oils were so frustrating to me - I could never make them do what I wanted, and the smell always gave me a headache in the little basement room where I painted at the time.

But in September of this year, I got them out again. I had been feeling for months like the paintings I REALLY wanted to make, required the velvety smoothness of oils. And I was COMPLETELY RIGHT.

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Nostalgia for Year One

If you are an artist now, you always have been.

If you will be an artist in the future, then you are an artist now.

You’re an artist whether you’re producing any work or not. Being an artist is a way of living and seeing the world.

So an interesting change took place in me after I had my first baby. Suddenly my trajectory toward a college degree (already a bleak-seeming path) was in jeopardy, and I was knee-deep in motherhood and LOVING IT. I loved being a homemaker and shaping a tiny life.

Out of the blue, an itch to create became so loud I couldn’t ignore it. Being a mom meant I was plenty busy, but it also included naptimes. So I made the transition from deeming my art unimportant (a mindset born from years of being scolded for making it more important than school) to opening my life and my world to include it.

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